Who's a Fat Bastard - It's hard being four

August 5, 2014

     I did it again. I hit the alarm, turned over, and went back to sleep. Today was Papa Squatch Dayscare. At first I thought I was dreaming. It sounded like angry squirrel sex. Slowly the words formed in my head. "Papa let us in". "Coming" I bellowed, while pulling on a shirt. "Christo wants to go with Mommy, are we still going to the lake?" Bella said before I had the door open. "Yes we're going to the lake, what's up with Christo?" I asked, but Bella had already moved on. 

     It's 8:30 and I haven't had a coffee yet. No Name instant coffee to the rescue. Three kids equal two scoops of instant buzz. I'm putting together a cooler of snacks for the lake. I cut up a watermelon. Wash some blueberries and some cherries. Water and juice boxes and we were out the door. 

     The GPS says it's seventeen minutes from my house to Buntzen Lake. I tune into Cenile 650 and I'm driving to the oldies! Out of nowhere I have a revelation. The music I grew up with, the Eagles, The Stones even the Beatles are now the oldies! How cool is that? I'm almost an Oldie myself. Soon...seniors discount!

     I must have been a better person in a previous life. We not only got primo parking we got the best table on the beach.

Mercedes Parking

The water was beautiful again. Just the right temperature and so nice and clean. The girls love the water.

Synchronized Swimmers

Christo, not so much. At least he has a bucket and shovel today.

Lizard Bucket Boy

I still had my mask and snorkel in my pack. The girls were really diggin that.

Bug eyed freak

Clarissa was able to use the snorkel Bella wasn't. Just the mask.

Scubella

Clarissa took the camera and took some pretty good pictures of fish. They are almost the same colour as the sand.

Trout on the run

At about 11:30 I dragged them out of the water for a snack. Ten minutes later they were back in the water.

Throw me Papa

     I read a chapter or two of my book while they played in the water. "Papa come throw me" Clarissa said. What are you gonna do? I threw her! Sort of. She stands on my hands and I throw her/she jumps over my head. Mostly jump with the condition of my shoulders. We packed up and headed out at about 1. I had promised them McDonalds. Off we go to Rotten Ronnie's. Two happy meals, one Jr Chicken with a small fries and Soda and six Mc Nuggets twenty bucks! Who's happy about that? And then they only half the food. As you can see, I don't take them there very often. When I do go to McDonald's, to poach the free WiFi, I have coffee. 

     The kids got into playland for about two minutes. Christo realised at the top of the playland tower, that the Poop Fairy was coming hard and fast. Like the punch line to an old joke "He gambled and he lost". It's hard being four. He has been doing so well. The combination of playland excitement and chicken McLugnuts, the poor kid didn't have a chance. Got him home and finished cleaning him up, Clarissa had him cleaned up pretty good already. 

     Everyone into the pool. Except Christo. He doesn't go in the pool.

Back in the pool

They stayed in the pool until Christian came to get them about 4. That's about the same time Lisa rolled in. Her call time 1:30 am! I sparked up the BBQ, made a Squatch salad and some Perogies for Lisa and threw a couple of T Bones on the grill.

And they were as good as they look!

Lisa was fed, showered and in bed by 6. I went to North Van to look at a trampoline. It was a good one but the frame was massive. I could never get it home. Lisa is getting up in six minutes to go to work. I have been watching PVR'd Mentalist episodes.

That's all I got.

Till next time

Peace Out Y'all

©2014 Dave Squatch Ward