December 14, 2014
The problem with going to bed before midnight is I wake up at 6 a.m. The good thing about waking up at 6 a.m. In December, in theory is, it's still dark out . If I don't see the sunlight I can often go back to sleep. Not today. My mind was racing. I brewed up a pot of drippy Joe and finished off yesterdays blog . It was done by 9:00 and I was just settling down in front of the TV for NFL Sunday when the lovely Lisa got out of bed. It took her all of two minutes
to send me scurrying off to Tiny TV town. Where I plan to spend what's left of the morning happily watching football. The only game I'm really interested in is the Seahawks game and that doesn't start until 1:00. That doesn't mean I won't watch any of the other fifteen games that stretch on for twelve hours every Sunday. I just don't care who wins. I haven't bet on sports since I left Campbell River and the Stu influence!
I was happily flicking back and forth between the three televised games. While the lovely Lisa was dealing with a family crisis taking place three thousand miles away. I am not at liberty to discuss it because I love my wife and want to continue living with her. Let's just say we like to keep our nuts in our own trees. I only mention it at all because it is making the lovely Lisa crazy.
Still in my pyjamas at noon, the lovely Lisa reminded me that we were going to a Birthday Party, this afternoon at 1:00. Who has a birthday party at 1:00 in the afternoon? Evan the one year old does.
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| Evan |
The good news is the party was being held at Evans Grandfather's condo party room only five minutes from our house. I haven't seen Claude in ten or more years.
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| Papa Squatch and Papa Claude |
I also suffer from panic attacks when I try to shop. It started ten years ago. I was standing in line to pay at London Drugs, already loaded down with gifts when my hands got clammy, my breathing was shortened and I was light headed. I put down the gifts, paid for or not and walked away. It was really bad for about five years. I couldn't drive by the Mall without shaking. It's not so bad now. I learned to make a list and buy what's on the list. I am totally unable to pull the trigger if there are multiple choices. The lovely Lisa does the shopping for the Grandkids. I guess there's a few nuts in my family tree as well!
Buying a gift for a one year old is easy. It says right on the box the age the child should be. Armed with an age appropriate gift in a Christmas bag, we made our way to the party.
Our connection to Evan is through his Grandma Michele, one of my oldest and dearest friends.
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| Grandma Michele and Evan |
I have known Evans mom Krista since she was not much older than Evan. Her and her partner Anthony had tried for a long time to have a child. Then along came Evan.
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| Evan the cutesicle |
I'm not really a baby person. Okay, they're cute, but that's about it! I don't want to hold them, I don't want to wear their bodily fluids and I don't want to change them. I prefer them when they get to be four years old. At that age they're potty trained, feed themselves and can understand my threats of being sold to the gypsies. I'm only kidding....sort of. I wouldn't even know how to find a gypsy.
Today's post has been a real challenge of my blogging skills. Nothing much happens at a One year old's party. Evan spent most of it staring at the other dozen or so children with a look of worry on his face.
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| Oh my! |
Most of the kids were under three years old. All of them were at least crawling and two or three of them were just starting to walk. Really, how long can a two foot tall person falling down amuse a grown man? Twenty-seven minutes.
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| Multi tasking, learning to walk and share |
After you catch up with the people you see once a year and meet the people that you haven't met before. You realise that you're the oldest person in the room. Well, Papa Claude is older than me. Not by much. Also ninety percent of them are there with their kids. The lovely Lisa and I have very few friends with young children. People with young children talk about nothing but there kids. I get it. They're responsible for this tiny person and their well being is always foremost on their minds. Personally I don't give a crap about little Billy's first poop on the potty! Unless he was like eleven or something. So now I'm trapped in a room with ten young mothers networking baby supplies. Kill me, please, Kill me! I was abandoned at this point by the lovely Lisa who was off taking pictures of pictures. Well, at least they had comfortable seating.
It was time to open the gifts. The only way a one year old is going to open a gift is if you let him eat the wrapping paper as he goes. Fortunately, there were several helpers in the unwrapping department, and one union guy!
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| Find the Union guy |
He was as all kids should be on their Birthday, showered with gifts. T shirts and toys and some delicious wrapping paper.
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| Krista and Evan |
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| Ant and son |
And of course there was cake.
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| Cake |
I didn't have any. Evan had lots!
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| Caaaaaake |
We now had a kiddie krack, sugar buzzed, half naked one year old on a tear.
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| Coffee, I need Coffee! |
That was our sign it was time to leave. We said our goodbyes and headed for home. Chef Boy R Lisa has a 12:30 am wakeup call. We were home by 3:30 and the lovely Lisa was in bed by 4:30. I couldn't do her a job in a million years. I'd fall asleep in the soup pot!
I watched the Seahawks game that I not only taped but hadn't heard the score of. They won, Green Bay lost, and all is good in the world. I went out and got some stuff that Mama Lee had asked for. Watched the Sunday night game, also taped, and waited for Chef Boy R Lisa to arise from the shell that was once the lovely Lisa.
I tried to write this last night, but after the first paragraph I didn't have anything to say. How can you make a day of Kiddy party and football interesting to anyone reading. It wasn't interesting to me! I didn't think so until I read back what I just wrote. I thought that this was going to be a short post today. It didn't work out that way. Is it interesting? I don't know. There is however a lot of it!
That's all I've got
Till next time
Peace out ya'll
©2014 Dave Squatch Ward
Your commentary is always interesting Squatch
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