October 6, 2014
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| Look at me Papa! |
I don't know where my head is at lately in regards to Weigh Day. I ended up weighing my self at 3 am. I was waiting on the Poop Fairy yesterday, hoping to shed a few pounds before weigh in. Stupid Poop Fairy. I am not at all disappointed. I have only been able to finish my workout once this past week due to my groinial problems. I haven't even tried the last three days. I'm up about a pound. Since I'm living the life of a giant land slug, that's not so bad.
Today is Papa Squatch Day Scare. Sort of. Jen dropped Christo off at my place after dropping Bella at school. Right across from my house. She's only six but already a proper little princess. Takes for ever to get ready. Jen tells me they are just getting out of the car at the bell most days. I'm only on about this because even though she goes to school right right across the street from my house. They can't stick their heads in the door and give Papa a kiss to start the day? Who wouldn't like that?
Christo goes to Pre-school about a five minute drive from our house. I got a hi/bye peck on the cheek from Jen and she was gone like summer wages. I dropped Christo off at 9:30 and went home to do my workout? That was the plan, honest. I thought I would just take it easy and slowly work through the groin problem. I started by collecting all the laundry. I will multi task! I'm getting pretty good at this multi task thing. I dropped the laundry basket in the kitchen and made my self a No Name instant coffee. I don't think it's right that it has no name. So, I named it Joe. No last name, like Madonna. It was at this point I realised I was living like an animal! There were coffee stains, dust bunnies, hell there were whole dust rabbits! I started looking around, the area around my chair was a mine field of pork rind shrapnel and Joe stains. With the laundry basket sitting on the kitchen floor I grabbed the broom and dust mop and started in the bathroom.
Our bathroom is always pretty clean. There's just the two of us. A few pine needles from Elvis and Nutmeg who will, if you don't close it properly, push open the door and sit there staring at you while you do your business. The reason this concerns me is Nutmeg sometimes eats her own poop. Maybe she thinks I'm making her a buffet! Oh yeah, and I sit down to pee, girly style. For the last forty years I have been living with women I love. None of whom wanted to clean my over spray off of the floor, seat, wall or anywhere else for that matter. So I sit. Sometimes, I start doing a crossword and forget I'm just having a pee until my ass falls asleep and I have numb bum. It's the bathroom! Generally speaking, other than the occasional shower duet, (it pays to conserve water) you are mostly on your own. And you do want to keep those things private. You don't want people to know that you squat to pee? Shit! Where's my eraser. Okay, unread that last bit.
I dust mop the entire house, still picking up bits of Mac. I must have moved the laundry basket ten times. How is that easier than starting the laundry? I'll tell you how, no stairs. I have nothing left to do but wash the floors now. I have a good spray mop so it's pretty easy. I decide to take the laundry down stairs since I was standing there holding it for the umpteenth time. I don't know if it was the weight of the laundry or just the stairs but I'd just like to say "ow." I think it was the weight, It was okay coming back up the stairs. I mopped the entire house and was just putting on my shoes to start my workout when the noon news came on. Noon, now what was I supposed to be doing. Shit!! Christo! I am supposed to be picking him up at noon. I changed into pants and made a beeline for pre-school. I was only a few minutes late and Christo was outside playing in the dirt. He was excited to see me and that always feels good.
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| Christo at Pre-school |
I did it. I supported the evil empire. I even drank the koolaid! There is a McDonalds in every Walmart. It's always right were you can't possibly miss seeing it. Especially when your four!
" Look Papa, we can have lunch now"
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| Happy Christo |
Oh the shame, the shame. It tasted really good! Oh the shame. The worst part was, he looks at me and says "This is the best hamburger ever Papa" Oh, well. "Are you going to finish those fries?"
From there we went to Lordco to pick up some tail light bulbs for his Dad's car. He is so good in a store. He stands there surrounded by shiny objects, right at eye level with his hands held behind his back. Nice training job by Jen. We were weaving our way back towards the bank when we came across this humongous playground. "Look Papa, four slides! He likes the slides. Not a swing fan yet. " Do you want to stop for a few minutes?" "Okay Papa"
We spent about twenty minutes in the playground. It's on a school property so all the kids were in class and Christo had it to himself. Not as much fun as when you have playmates. And your Papa keeps saying " Say cheese weenie"
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| enough with the camera already! |
After he was done playing we went to Rona to drop off the dead bulbs and the bank to deposit some Royalty cheques. Money for nothing, gotta like it. By now it's 2:30 and we need to pick Bella up at school at 2:45. We had a little time to kill since the school is thirty seconds from our place. I played a little guitar while Christo was a trampoweenie. Next door Gord asked me to help him take his air conditioner out of the window for the winter. I hoisted Christo over the fence and he played on their swing set while i lifted out the air conditioner. Alice gave Christo a Dilly Bar, he's a weird kid, he doesn't eat sweets. At his own birthday, he didn't even have cake! I don't want this Papa. I told Alice I would save it for Bella who doesn't have an aversion to ice cream. Then snuck around the corner and swallowed it whole! I was like a Python swallowing that Dilly Bar like it was a chocolate coated rat! More shame! After you've stooped to Rotten Ronnie's does it even matter? Ice cream is my crack. I can't control myself when I know it's around.
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| Cannonball!!! |
We went over to the school and picked up Bella. Our tenants son Matty, is in the same grade as Bella and have known each other since they moved in nearly four years ago. Now he has playmates.
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| The Gang. Christo, Matty and Bella. |
I grew up listening to sports on the radio. Hiding under the sheets in bed with my transistor radio I got for Christmas, listening to the leafs play in Chicago or New York or the best, against the hated Canadiens! The problem was it ran on batteries. Batteries cost money. I would cry if I fell asleep and my batteries died. It meant no Leafs on school nights. To this day I enjoy watching the games on the radio. Visualising the play, seeing the faces of my favourite players. Bobbie Baun and Tim Horton crushing the hated Maurice Richard as he crossed the blue line. Eddie Shack tearing up and down the wing like a train off the tracks to get the puck to the Captain George Armstrong. I was ten years old when the leafs last won the cup. I didn't think anything could be better than that. Then I reached puberty and changed my mind!
This blog is turning into war and peace.
I grilled our burgers and we sat together as we always do to share a meal. I made mine between two pieces of leaf lettuce. No relation to the Maple Leafs though I'm sure they will wilt at some point of the season.
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| Not as easy to eat as it looks. |
After the game I went down to Walmart with the dogs to get the furnace filters I didn't get this afternoon. While I was there I checked out the turkey's for Thanksgiving. $0.95 pound! I already have one but we do a two bird thanksgiving. We have 20 plus folks every year. One year we had thirty -one! That's a full house. The best part is, it's Flamingo Brand.
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| The other white meat! |
That's all I got.
Till next time.
Peace Out Y'all
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