Who's a Fat Bastard - get down, get back up again

October 10, 2014

The return of the Mac Attack

     It's done, I took the Hazelnut out of the Hazelnut highway. When we found these two little sprouts growing out of two little Hazelnuts six years ago, we had no idea the thing would grow to 40 feet. Combined with the fact the Squirrel Army and the Jays get all the Hazelnuts. It had to go.Today was the day.

Before

Lisa and I had already trimmed a huge amount of the tree before Wednesday's green waste pickup. You are only allowed what fits into the bin. The good news is Hazelnuts are very shallow rooted. They spread their roots for quite a distance and it was getting closer to my water line. I started by digging around the base of the tree.

And digging, and digging. Do you remember how I said Hazelnuts have shallow roots? They do, and lots of them. It was impossible to get a shovel full of sand out from between those roots.

It was obvious I was going to have to get down and dirty. I don't mind getting dirty, but getting down means getting back up again. Not my strong suit.

On hands and knees I scraped and clawed at the dirt till I had roots exposed, and then I lopped them off with the pruning shears. Bending the tree over to expose the last of the roots Christian and I bent it to the ground and Lisa cut the last of the roots from the root ball.

All in all, it took about three hours to take out both trees. Not counting the hour Lisa and I spent on the front deck with our good friend Al. He was recently in San Fransisco and brought Lisa and I coffee mugs, great big beautifully painted coffee mugs.

     Al has been a good friend of mine going back more than fifteen years. He travels a lot and always brings us back a little token from his trips. That's how he got to be a "Good" friend. By bringing me stuff. So if you want to move up the friend list? No pressure, just saying. A fridge magnet is always nice.

      He has had and continues to have, a most interesting existence. I can sit and talk to Al for hours! And the best part is, he wakes very easily. He is recovering from a car accident and having a rough go of it pain wise. It was good to see him out and about and the perfect reason to stop playing in the dirt. Lisa made a pot of coffee and Al not only liked it, he complimented it. You see as much as we love AL, he's a coffee snob. He has a Starbucks debit card. He usually shows up at our house for coffee with a Starbucks in hand. The look on his face when I told him it was No Name Dark Roast in the 925 g package for $7.49. was priceless. I think he just has a Starbucks cup that he fills with the Maxwell House Instant that he gives to me when I visit his house! 

     After he left Christian and I took out the other tree, replanted the dozens of tulip and Daffodil bulbs dug up in the process, chain sawed the trunk into fire place size logs and cleaned up the sidewalk.

After

     I didn't realise how many flowers we have on our deck. Which is dumb because I'm the one who waters them. I never purchased or planted any of them, yet somehow they became my responsibility. I water them, I miracle grow them, I even deadhead them. Today I took pictures of them. These are all still alive on our front deck on October 10, 2014. The top picture is of Mums, the last three are Fuchsias. The ones in between ??????

 Fuchsias are my favourite flower.

 They look like Ballerinas.

 I know, your saying, "Squatch, that's a crap load of filler in today's blog." I just think it's amazing that in the second week of October, I still have to water them every day.  Why can't they just die like every other flower in Canada. 

     Lisa went to see Momma Lee and I used the opportunity to plug in the lap steel guitar Next Door Gord lent me. I have never played one and when I plugged it in earlier in the day Lisa appeared in the doorway. "That's annoying" she stated. Judging by her tone of voice this was not an opinion, it was a fact. I put it away. Now that the noise Nazi was out of the house, I had that lap steel turned up to twelve! It sounded soooooo bad! I turned it down, googled a chord chart and soon was playing something akin to music. It didn't sound great but it was a lot of fun. The picking part is easy. Manipulating the slide is a little more difficult. Lisa has suffered through me learning to play the guitar and now the Casio keyboard and a lap steel. Talk about pushing it! The case has a bunch of sheet music for Hawaiian songs. I can follow a chord chart, but I can't read music. Sorry Next Door Gord.

     When Lisa got home we got showered and dressed for dinner. We had talked about having dinner with Gord and Penny but we somehow missed hooking up with them. I don't know why I didn't call Gord on his cell, Duh. So we decided to go to Taqueria Playa Tropical in New West on Sixth St. On the way we texted Willy and Annie and told them what we were doing. We had just settled in with the menu when Willy walked in. He had just gotten the message while he was next door at the Rivers Reach Pub. They do a prime rib dinner for $12 on Friday and Saturday. They had planned to have dinner there but decided to join us instead. Because we're more fun than prime rib!

Annie and Willy  Donde este las pappas fritas

They had a guitar player and a conga player playing latin music. They were both very talented. They had great harmonies. We were enjoying the music and the food.

I paid no attention to what I was putting in my mouth other than it tasted soooo good. More carbs were consumed in this one meal than I have had in weeks. I'm not going to sweat it. I'm already back at it, I was hungry while writing this so, at 2:30 in the morning I'm eating chicken salad lettuce wraps. 

Why am I eating chicken salad lettuce wraps at 2:30 in the morning? Because I had three cups of coffee with my dinner, and now it's seven hours since we had dinner, and I'm bouncing off the walls. I have to be careful since I tweaked my groin working out yesterday that I don't blow up like a balloon in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade! 

     Writing is like a time machine . We are now back pre chicken salad lettuce wraps. After dinner we went over to Willy and Annie's for Tea and biscuits. They were just in Scotland so they brought back as many biscuits as they could. Caramel bars, Penguins and Chocolate Chip Shortbread Cookies from Davey Stewart's Mum. I ate one. I liked it. Shut up! You don't know man, you weren't there!

Temptation from the bowels of Glasgow!

We traded stories of our recent trips and reacquainted ourselves with Mac. Who lost his freakin mind when he saw us.

He spent half the night on Lisa's lap and the rest of the time trying to get onto Lisa's lap. He's such a cutie.

It was a most pleasant evening and we said our goodbyes about 11:15. When we got home there was a message from Gord and Penny. They were right next door at the Rivers Reach for prime rib while we were at the Taqueria. Doh!

     I tucked Lisa in and came into my office to write this blog. Tomorrow is Weigh Day. I know my lifestyle change is working. I feel so much better mentally and physically. I'm not letting myself get hung up on the numbers. I know my body is still changing shape because my Bro Steve told me I have chicken legs! They do seem to be getting thinner. I never had any extra meat on my legs anyway. I spent 20 years carrying around 350 plus pounds on these skinny pegs. It was the only part of me not fat! Tomorrow is Saturday, Canucks and Lions on the tube. I Missed the Whitecaps game tonight but they won.  They beat Seattle and won the Cascadia Cup. They might make the playoffs yet!

That's all I got.

Till next time.

Peace Out Y'all

©2014 Dave Squatch Ward