Return of the Fat Bastard- If she even looked sideways at me!!!! I'd grab her by the Pu#@y!!

      October 12th 2016

At the DMV

      I did something today I haven't done since May. I played Pitch and Putt at Kensington with my friend Nick Peacock. I don't know how it happened. The lovely Lisa and I have played at least once a week for many years. I guess my health has had a lot to do with it. Not my heart, Just a steady litany of infections that I've been dealing with. Combined with a couple of trips to the island and a couple of visits from family and a slide down the Coast to Portland Oregon for a family event. It seems we were never able to find the time. I did find time for breakfast . I made a leftover Sausage Stuffing Fritata/Omelet Thingy. It was delicious!

Under the broiler to firm it up and brown the cheese

With the almost last of the home grown tomatoes.

      I met Nick at 11:00 at Kensington Park Pitch and Putt. I now this course pretty well. For years I lived a couple of hundred yards form the 10th hole. In a house on the corner of Union and Springer.  Many a night I would hop the fence at number 10 at dusk and play a few holes. Usually until I lost a ball or two in the shadows. Not an issue today. The weather was fantastic. They say the remnants of a Typhoon is on it's way and is going to hit tonight. Make hay while the sun shines! Or play golf at least. Nick was there in the parking lot when I pulled up. I have a club caddy so I'm totally organized. Everything at my fingertips. Nick carried three clubs and had to do a lot of bending over.

Bent over Peacock!

It didn't help, he beat me by a stroke.

Proud as a Peacock winner by a stroke.

       We're kind of an odd couple. Nick is a sixty year old retired English Policeman and I'm me. When he retired from the force he went and worked in Dubai for several years where he did security for some crazy wealthy clients. I met him while I was doing security at the Vancouver Convention Centre and we hit it off right away. The lovely Lisa has played with us several times but today she was Chef Boy R Lisa out in Langley. The course is only about 2000 yards and takes about two hours to play. We had a group of five Asian seniors in front of us but when we caught up to them on number six they let us play through. They had already teed off and stood back as first Nick then I dropped our tee shots onto the green. The first green we had both hit. I only mention that they were Asian because of their reaction when we hit. They cheered and applauded. I've never seen that before. Then we all walked down the hill together to the green where Nick made his par and I three putted for a four. They were still waving and saying goodbye as we rounded the corner to the next tee box. I didn't have my best round and neither did Nick but we had a great game. Nick has the same attitude about golf that the lovely Lisa and I have. It's supposed to be fun. Good shot, bad shot, who cares? We are out walking in the sun with friends. Is there anything better?
     After our round we headed to the North Burnaby Inn's Admiral Pub. $3.75 beers and decent food in a relaxed atmosphere. We ordered a beer and lunch.They do a different food special every day. Today's special was a roast beef dinner for $7. It seemed a little much for lunch.  I had a Rueben sandwich and Nick had a pizza.
      I learnt something disturbing about Mr Nicholas Peacock! He's an Edmonton Oilers Fan! Yet he seems so normal, I mean for a Brit! He's a big sports fan and we covered everything from World Cup Qualifying to the CFL. Ninety minutes at the Admiral and we said our goodbyes in the parking lot hoping the weather lets us get out on the course next week. All in all a very nice day of golf and friendship.
      Next on the list was to return  Lise's glasses that she left at our house on Thanksgiving. She lives in New Westminister in the same building as GMcT. I had arranged to drop the glasses off with him and Sherry who are now an item. Do people still say that? Can you be an item, or is that not PC? Parking at GMcT's is always a challenge. There are three highrise apartments in a clump and only about thirty parking spots. I pulled up and there was a spot right across from the front doors. I felt like I'd won the lottery! GMcT buzzed me in and I chatted with people in the lobby who I have met before at various functions but can't remember their names. The door to their suite was open when I got there and Sherry was making the Kuerig coffee. I hung out for about half an hour. Talking baseball Go Blue Jays! and hockey, Go Canucks! I would have liked to stay longer but I had a rather onerous task ahead of me.
      As I headed out of Dunwood Place, my head hung in shame. I began the long trek back to Coquitlam and the DMV to pay my fine for texting while driving. I wasn't embarrassed by the texting ticket. I was embarrassed because they towed my car and made me stand at the side of the road like a criminal because they found a little weed in my car. I wasn't charged for the weed, half a joint, but he wrote on the citation that I was given a driving prohibition. I didn't know what was going to come up on the computer screen. I also don't know why I care. I was embarrassed that I got caught, not that I smoke. Still, if she even looked sideways at me!!!! I'd grab her by the P^#@y!! Just kidding. I had a Donald moment! Do the crime, do the time! Unless your Hillary!
      I walked right up to the reception and even though the place seemed to be nearly empty the receptionist gave me a number and sent me off to sit and wait. A23 that was my number. I thought, cool because A22 was being served even as I sat down. All of a sudden the reception area was swamped. I was patting myself on the back when the next number came up C102, then D 236 and then a bunch more numbers that weren't mine.

Hurry up and wait

The waiting room was now packed and I started thinking people were being called in front of me who were here after me. Then I started thinking it was because of the weed! They were making an example of me! Then they called my number. She punched in my license, took my $364 for texting and driving and handed me my receipt with that government employee meaningless thank you. She was smiling and pleasant enough in that I've worked at the DMV too long kind of way. Looking down at my receipt it felt more like F#@K You!
      I sat down and watched the Leafs/ Senators game. Matthews scored four as the Leafs managed to pull defeat from the jaws of Victory! They could use a goalie. Hey, how about Miller? Pleeeeeease!!!
      The lovely Lisa got home about 8:30 and the weekend begins. I had already eaten. I sat with the lovely Lisa while she had her dinner, talking about her day and about the Donald. The lovely Lisa is Lunatic Lisa when it comes to Trump. I think she'd cut off his junk with a bread knife if the opportunity arose. He seems to come up in every conversation I have lately. With everyone. Not a lot of fans in the Great White North, Donald. I'm sure he reads my blog so I should get tweeter smashed soon! I have to say it seems a lot of Canadians are getting very uptight about the possibility of President Donald. And we should be concerned. We have a vested interest in the outcome of the election. There's only one catch, We don't have a vote! We are not Americans and that's something to be happy about. I'm not talking about individual Americans. By far the vast number of Americans I have met and know, are wonderful people just trying to be happy and live in peace. Their Government on the other hand is a corrupt and bloated machine that puts the welfare of the elected representative in front of the welfare of the people who elected them. They don't care about the average person. In the last eight years the only bills that made it through the house or senate were the bills that made sure the money for running the Government, ( Their wages) kept flowing. It's hard to believe that these two are the best that America has to offer! Mind you, we Canadians should talk. Our prime Minister is still out on his Good Hair Tour giving away money we don't have to people who hate us. Yay! Once again Death by Chi Chi!!


That's all I've got
Till next time
Peace out Y'all