March 11th 2017
Hello again. It's been 6 weeks since I sat behind the keyboard and brought my thoughts into the real world. To quote myself from one of my songs "A thought that's left unspoken is never proven true." I have not been writing because I have been in a constant state of physical, mental and emotional flux. At least that is how I have justified the stagnation in my creative process to myself! The biggest lies we tell are the ones we tell ourselves. I haven't actually been devoid of ideas or thoughts worthy of putting into print, it's just that they have been particularly dark and upsetting.
I haven't been writing about my physical issues because nobody likes a whiner. It's the strangest thing . It's like I turned 60 and all of a sudden I'm past my best before date or BBD! "Sorry Mr Ward, it appears that your colon has expired. We'll just go in and take a look around" " Sorry Mr Ward, it seems your prostate is swollen. We'll just go in and take a look around." Really? They can scan your ass with your clothes on at the Airport but they have to "go inside" and take a look around at the Hospital? Was there a need to do this? Or was it just because of my age? I wasn't having any issues I was aware of. The worst part was the waiting. I got a letter telling me there was an issue with my sample and they would call and let me know about the follow up. They took 9 weeks to call and arrange an appointment for my probing, 5 weeks later. Here's the thing about the internet. You can find anything you want on line. Pictures of diseased colons, cancer filled bladders, porn, anything you want. I did not do so well with the stress of waiting. My fertile imagination had me shitting in a bag and the lovely Lisa giving me sponge baths for the rest of my life. Okay I like the sponge bath part.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_rW2joNoyI
I had my Colonoscopy on the Wednesday and my Weenieoscopy on the Friday. Nothing like staying busy! My urologist went in after applying a numbing gel to my little big man and two minutes later got down to it (not fun) When he was done he asked me how much coffee I drank. I thought really? 5 minutes with my junk and your hitting on me! Turns out caffeine can cause the prostate to enlarge. When I told him I drank 10 or 12 cups a day he said "STOP IT!" So I'm down to two or three cups now. Other than that everything looks good. Sometimes when I'm bored I think I can feel my prostate shrinking. Could just be me! And if it is shrinking it's the only part of me that is!
My Proctologist on the other hand was a regular Chatty Cathy. On the plus side I was so heavily sedated I can't remember what we were talking about. I spent over an hour with my ass in the air and my insides on the monitor in 50 inches of high def color! It was pink and healthy but with more stalactites than the Bat Cave! He removed 3 of the biggest ones and said that was enough for today and I would need two or three more probings to remove the rest of the polyps. Yay! He said to call next week and arrange a date for my next probing. Before I could call, they called me. The biopsy on my butt polyps was in and the Dr needed to see me in his office. " Okay when can he see me?" "A week Thursday" It was Monday. 11 days to worry about possible butt rot! Of course they wouldn't tell me anything on the phone. I tried googling "What's up with my ass" I wouldn't recommend this unless you actually want to see what people put up their ass! This is my biggest fear about my anal probing. What if I start to like it? What if I find myself cruising the aisles at London Drugs looking for the Home Colonoscopy Kit? Sheeesh, something else to worry about!
Between the caffeine withdrawal and the waiting the lovely Lisa has been a Saint as I was a tad on the cranky side. After a week or so I found myself feeling less anxious than I was when I was banging back the Java. There was nothing wrong. I can only assume he had me come out to his office in Langley so he could bill Medical Services for a visit. Two seconds of "You're all good" on the phone is not a money maker.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQ_B8Gq8dak
Then I got the Flu. Fever of 101 for 2 days. The lovely lisa was freaking because of my heart issues and we were in constant contact with Dr Dan, or at least the lovely Lisa was. I was miserable and cantankerous. I love that word. When I'm sick, I just want to be left alone. When I'm sick the lovely Lisa turns into Florence Nightingmare. She took my temperature so many times the battery died in the thermometer and I built up a callous under my tongue! At one point I told her where she could stick the damn thing and she threatened to actually do it! With my newly roto rootered access I considered it! The lovely Lisa made me soup. She makes the best soup ever. I lived on her chicken soup for 4 days. The flu hangover lasted for the better part of 2 weeks. Sore throat and a harsh sounding cough.
Another sign that I'm past my BBD. I reached down to pick up my guitar and tore my rotator cuff. Again! It's not the first time but this time it was different. I couldn't even hold my guitar let alone play it. I tore it the first time playing tennis in Lo Manzanilla Mexico with the then lovely Girlfriend Lisa on our 6 week preproposal Mexican camping trip. I figured any woman who could live in a tent with me for 6 weeks is a keeper. But that's another story. My hand and forearm started swelling up overnight and I ended up in emergency for 5 hours. Of course the lovely Lisa was with me keeping my spirits up. I hate that! I was in pain and looking to make someone pay for it. They did an xray gave me T3's that made me puke and sent me home with a requesition for a specialized scan that had none of the correct information on it. It took 3 days of phone calls and two visits to the scanning department at the Royal Columbian hospital and twice to Medi Ray who had no idea what I was talking about. It was finally straightened out after my second trip to Royal Columbian. I get my scan on May the fourth be with you. Sorry, I couldn't help it. At this writing my shoulder feels better than it has in years.
I have been having the Grandkids for Papa Squatch Dayscare quite often. They are here for an hour in the morning and a couple of hours after school. I have to take advantage of this opportunity to spend time with them while they're still here. Jen and Christian bought a house in Maple Ridge and Bella and Christopher won't be going to school across the street anymore. They move at the end of March. I think that has been harder for me emotionally then any of the health issues. I guess I thought that with the housing market the way it is things would stay the same. Soon it will be just family events and occasional visits if they're in the hood. I know. I'm being selfish. The truth is I couldn't be prouder of Jen and Christian. Jen is a Rock Star in the film business and Christian is making good dough as a painter. In today's market, what they have done is impressive. I've just been around long enough to know how this story ends. See what I mean whiny bullshit stuff.
I filmed a couple of days on the new Predator movie and spent a lot of time working on my music and on my childrens book When Santa's in Vancouver. I'm working with a very talented artist and we should have it done and available by September. I'm working on my music and playing every day. I'm saddened by the condition of my Takamine guitar. It's 40 years old and the electrics are falling apart. I've taken it to 2 shops and both said no parts are available. It still sounds great and for now the electrics are still working. At some point I'll need to replace it but I have 6 guitars now. The lovely Lisa won't be keen on me getting another. On the upside I'm playing my hollow body electric a lot more.
Lastly, and this is the part where I'm sure I am going to lose some of you. Let me present you with a scenario that is becoming all too familiar.
A politician is giving a speech to a group of supporters. A group with a different point of view shows up and proceeds to shout down the speaker, physically intimidate and assault anyone who objects, then sets fires and destroys property in the name of freedom of speech. Where did this happen? 1933 Germany or 2017 U Cal Berkley the home of free speech? The truth is it happened in both places. I see protesters carrying signs calling Trump a Fascist while their actions are right out of the Nazi playbook. I hear the rhetoric being spewed by Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer and Elizabeth Warren and it makes me ashamed to be a liberal. I would never have voted for Trump but that doesn't change the fact that the hate and vitriol is all coming from the left. It is embarrassing. I think Trump is caricature of a President, but the crap they're throwing out there is absurd. I'm not impressed with what he's doing, but to compare him to a dictator whose government policy exterminated millions of people is beyond dishonest. I can't watch it anymore and thankfully as a Canadian I don't have to live under the American President. I get to live under our Prime Minister who is still on his give away money we don't have to people who hate us tour. But, his hair looks great. I guess my point is that before you start calling people those kind of names you should read a history book. Before you start calling people Fascists you should stop acting like Fascists. The reason that Trump will fail is not because of his boorish behaviour but because of the life long politicians who occupy Washington DC. The status Quo works just fine for them. $100 grand per, free health care for life and whatever you can skim off the top of your campaign contributions. The campaign and fundraising of course starts the moment you are sworn in. Like it or not trump was elected because he had a message that resonated with the people most affected by the global economy. The middle class. Those people in Michigan, or Wisconsin who used to make $20 an hour making auto parts and now, if they have a job, are making half of that at a McDonalds or a Walmart. While Trump was talking about jobs and business, Hillary was talking about women's rights and who gets to use which bathroom. She was an absolutely horrible candidate which didn't help either. They also seemed to be unaware that they had lost so many seats in all the houses and at every level of government that in most of the middle of the country they were irrelevant, yet kept saying everything's good. Bad Campaign, Bad Candidate = Bad Result.
But an even worse result of the election of Donald Trump is the total meltdown on the left. They look like petulant losers. They have the much heralded Woman's March but refused to let pro life women who don't agree with their abortion on demand platform participate. The tactics of abuse and intimidation at the Colleges and Universities across the country when confronted with an opposing opinion is terrifying. Once the hot bad of new ideas and well thought out differing views they have now become indoctrination programs for the progressive agenda. Offer a differing opinion than your Professor and you fail. I don't think that is how it is supposed to work. We on the left have to stop this name calling and whining and get out and convince all those people in the middle of the country that we have a better plan than wide open borders and minimum wage jobs for everyone. Wake up Democrats. Stop playing to the far left base. You're crap is driving moderates and independents straight into the arms of Trumplestiltskin.
I have always been a social liberal and a fiscal conservative. I believe that we all have the right to live the way we choose as long as we don't infringe on the rights of others to do the same. I do not believe that everyone else has an obligation to support you while you do it. If no one buys the songs you write should the government pay you so you can do what you love or should you go get a job like 99.9% of all musicians, artists, actors and other creative people have had to do since the beginning of time. Even in Cave man days, sure it was fun to have Grog the Hunchbacked Comic around the campfire on the hunt, but in the dead of winter when food is scarce, who do you think they eat first?! "Ughh, Grog taste funny"
I believe that everyone has the right to worship as they so choose to whichever made up Diety they so choose. They do not however have the right to be offended by some one else's choice of made up Diety. Why should Christmas be offensive to non believers? or Ramadan? or Hannuka or even those crazy Budhists with their yoga and Yoggi's their overpowering incense and Gumby like poses that I will never do! The most important part of freedom of religion is that we are free to not have any religion at all. I'm an old Hippie. I believe that God lives inside each and everyone of us. Call it your soul or your conscience. It's the voice in your head and the feeling in your gut when you are about to do something wrong. I've had that feeling many times and to be honest, for a large part of my life I became very adept at ignoring that voice. After having a stroke at the age of 30 I started to listen to that voice all the time. The improvements in my life have been immeasurable.
You can't legislate morality. The only thing any of us have any control over is what we choose to do with our personal beings. You can force people to do what you want them to by intimidation or coercion but that only breeds contempt and animosity. Each and everyone of us has to decide what's best for us. Then make it happen. All the protests in the world will not stop Trump from being the President. Time would be better spent trying to convince your neighbours and friends through logic and real time solutions that we have a better way. Not through hateful rants and outrageous prognostications.
The last thing I want to touch on is the whole Russia/Obama Bugged me thing. What a Red Herring and the Haters ate it up like cheese cake on both sides of the political spectrum. Now we get the never ending he said, she said! He talked to the Russian Ambassador! He bugged the German Chancellor! He's banning ALL Muslims! He wire tapped right leaning reporters! His Dad screwed an Orangutan! and so on and so forth. Even though I agree with a lot of his economic platforms. I strongly disagree with him as a human being. As for health care, it seems to me that with 325 million people a government single payer system would work pretty good. At a $15 a month premium per person that would be almost 4.875 billion dollars a month. It seems like a no brainer. I think most people in Canada buy extended health from private insurers so they have dental coverage and things like physio. It's not perfect. The waits can be long, especially to see specialists. The government dictates how many patients they can see so a lot of specialists work part time. Even the walk in clinics are often closed by noon because they have reached their quota. Sad but true. You will however probably not die in the waiting room. You'll die at home after being released while still ill due to a shortage of beds. Jeez that sounded snarky!
As for immigration. We're all from somewhere else. I'm an immigrant myself. Born in Glasgow Scotland I came here on a steam ship in 1958. My earliest memories were of a three story walk up in Toronto's West End. Mom and Dad and four kids in three rooms. No help from the government. No Government health care. It wasn't in effect until 1966. Immigration is an important part of our culture and our heritage. I do believe we need to know who it is that is coming here. I don't understand why, when we see Iranian TV showing 100 thousand people in the streets chanting "Death to America Death to Isreal" I should want any of these people in my country. Ask Germany or France how that has worked out for them? Even Sweden with it's ultra form of socialism is overwhelmed. Nearly bankrupt and a large portion of it's female population living in fear. What makes people think that bringing people in from countries that treat women as chatel to one of the most egalitarian places on earth is going to work. Let's not make the same mistakes. We need to bring people into the country that share our basic core values. Who's quest for freedom does not involve restricting someone else's. Who is tolerant of all other opinions, not just the ones they agree with. And finally people who understand that hatred and violence has never solved anything, no matter what your God or your Government tells you. Keeping people who hate out of our country seems like a pretty good idea and leaves my conscience clear. I don't think that's too much to ask. That in return for the life Canadian society offers you, you accept these fundamental Canadian values. Leave your hate and your prejudices behind and make the most of your new country. Work hard to contribute and welcome to Canada.
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